Characteristics of a Pious Husband

On the Day of Judgment :Allah will ask men if they fulfilled their obligations towards their families. They who fear Allah will do their best to direct the way his wife and children live by educating himself and his family to living according to the Sunnah of the Prophet(Sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) and the Holy Qur’an, the final word of Allah.

The Prophet(Sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) said, “The best of you is the best one to his family.” [Al-Tabarani]

To share food with her, to provide her with (decent) clothes as he provides himself, to refrain from smacking her, and not ignoring her but in the house. [Ahmad]

One should not hate his believer wife. If he dislikes some of her attitudes, he would (surely) like others (attitudes). [Muslim]

Woman was created from a bent rib and will not be made straight for you on one way (that you like). If you want to enjoy her, you enjoy her while she is still bent. If you want to straighten her up, you will break her. Breaking her is divorcing her. [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]

Do (volunteer) fasting (some days) and do not fast (in other days), pray at night (some nights) and sleep (in other nights). Your body has a right on you (to rest), your eye has a right on you (to sleep), and your wife has a right on you. [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]

Fear Allah in (treating) women. [Muslim]

Be advised to treat women righteously. [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]

And live with them honorably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing that Allah brings through it a great deal of good. [4:19]

The Prophet (Sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) said,”A Dinar (a currency) that you spend on your family, a Dinar that you spend on a poor person and a Dinar that you spend in the sake of Allah. The one that carries the most reward is the one that you spend on your family.” [Muslim]

The Prophet(Sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) said to Saaid ibn Abi Waqqas,”Know that no charity that you give whether small or large, for the sake of Allah, but you will be rewarded for it, even the bite (of food) that you put in your wife’s mouth.” [Bukhari & Muslim]

by Al-Islaah Publications

22 thoughts on “Characteristics of a Pious Husband”

  1. Mashallah!

    How beautiful is this!. We must all treat our wives with kindness and we must do all sorts of good deeds.Jazak Allah Khair!

  2. I am really pleased to read that…..feeling happiness inside my heart ….. Hope that I can always follow this way

  3. salaam aleikoum,

    they say the best gift is to be blessed with a sincere loving muslim woman

    but its also a blessing to have a sincere loving muslim man

    they are hard to find

    1. It’s not hard. If you find it hard it mean you are not in the right path of islam. Allah says in surah Noor that Bad men are for Bad women and vise versa. Good men are for Good women and vise versa. So in order to get a good pious Muslimah you should be Good and pious first then the rest leave to Allah.

      Wabillahi tawfiq

  4. This article describes how one should treat his wife, with kindness and respect and to provide for his family. But it doesn’t talk about how a husband should help his wife in the home. We men must learn to separate culture from religion and pick up a hoover and wash some dishes. Helping ones wife in all aspects

  5. …and by helping ones wife looks good in the eyes of allah. remember Mohamed (PBUH) helped in the house as well. he cleaned, he washed his own clothes. he was always helpful with his wives.

  6. i wish men understand this and have big hearts..because wemen do not object whatsoever their men do..they take everything as their fate and cooperate..men must let go of their ego..its not gonna bring them joy..if they want their wives to respect them and obey them then they shuld first let go of their ego and respect their wives…if they wont let go of their ego their wives will fear them ,hate them but never respect them from the depth of their hearts…and whenever they will get a chance they will show their dislike..whether in this world or the next.

  7. Assalamu Alaikum,

    Men should not show to her wife that he dislikes something about her because there will be time when the women notice. I hope men these days are Pious, because as what as I can see men these days are not.

    Wassalam.. May Allah Bless us all.

  8. Posting a quote from another forum :

    I have a few suggestions for you brothers and sisters:
    You sisters should acknowledge that there are ignorant/dunya-focusing sisters in Islam.
    You brothers should acknowledge that there are ignorant/dunya-focusing brothers in Islam.
    Both should acknowledge that not all sisters are bad and not all brothers are bad.

    Please stop generalizing all the time, instead try to lead a beneficial discussion from which we can learn and move on to positively progress in our marital life.

    http://www.sunniforum.com/forum/showthread.php?56025-Pious-Muslim-Women-of-THIS-ERA-How-to-recognise-one&p=461157&viewfull=1#post461157

  9. Mostly what laed to divorce between husband and wife is lack of full knowledge of the right of a wife by the husband especially in some part of Africa that treat their wives as slave. thanks for your enlightenment may Allah reward you abundantly. how i wish all Muslims accross the globe will subscribe to this.

    Abdulazeez Kabiru
    Abuja Nigeria

  10. My husband was a good muslim, but the problem he was a perfectionest, i was unhappy for picking on little stupid things and over looking the very big things. may god bless his soul and forgive him. dying at 40 due to Cancer, leaving behind 3 little boys, i can only wish for those days that he picked on me,,,,,,

  11. Please give advise?My friend’s husband like to spend hours and hours in the internet than spend time with her, kind like he merriage to the interner since he got it. He aslo shout and yell when his mad on little thing and calls her the B word and aslo he calls her (sleep and eat) all the time.She’s nor working.She’s cook,clean, take care of her child. He always complains that she did do or she can’t do.Also more than 6 years he doesn’t sleep with her as hurband and wife.When she asks, he always excuse.Yes, he make his solah,ramadan.He goes to masjid all the time,but he always mad all the time kind like he’s not happy she’s being there. She’s always feeling leftout becouse he feel that he never appreciate her as his wife.They married like 12 yrs now. He’s from Africa, she’s from Asia.Their age 22 yrs different. I was wondering myself it is becouse they’re different cultures or what?

  12. Men want respect, woman want to feel loved. The more a woman respects her husband, the more he loves her. The more a man loves his wife and treats her well, the more she respects him.
    Inshallah, I hope we can all follow this simple advice:)

  13. mashaalah may we ol heb a pious husband to strengten more our imaan and will lead us to JANNAH!!!!!! subhanallah may the EXALTED one grant it to us allahumma Ameen:)

  14. atun. it’s better to marry a person in your own race or someone that has a similar culture to start with. if it is causing problems she should divorce him.

    most africans do not like to show their wives respect, all they are, are lustful people. even it be a somalian or nigerian they are all lustful. they do not respect others. i know someone that is asian married to an african, he beats her up and tells her she is dirt. that is an african.

  15. brother God fearing, fear Allah. Remeber the words of the prophet(saw)… An arab is not superior to a non arab, a white is not superior to a black. Simply because u find a few Africans who beat up their wives dosent mean that all africans are wife bashers. In every community, we have got black sheeps. U cannot paint all Africans with one brush.
    U also claimed that all africans are lustfull people.. as u make this comment eloquently, i hope u dont 4get that Bilal the great muazzim of this ummah and Zayd the adopted son of the prophet(saw) are also Africans… Dont make me think u are a racist!

  16. Right on brother Abdulmumini! Your reply and approach to commenter “god fearing” is level-headed and informative, jazaky’Allah khair. My approach was a bit different, but hopefully gets the point across as well.

    to “god fearing”:

    You make incredibly problematic (read: racist) comments in generalizing about a peoples from an entire continent. Is your culture above others so that you think you have the right to look down upon others by proclaiming “they” are lustful, disrespectful, etc.?

    To reiterate, here’s the extended part of the Prophet’s (pbuh) last sermon:

    “All mankind is from Adam and Eve. An Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab, nor does a non-Arab have any superiority over an Arab; a white has no superiority over a black, nor does a black have any superiority over a white; [none have superiority over another] except by piety and good action.”

    Atun:

    Here’s another part of that same sermon which the Prophet (pbuh) says:

    “O People, it is true that you have certain rights with regard to your women, but they also have rights over you. Remember that you have taken them as your wives only under a trust from God and with His permission. If they abide by your right then to them belongs the right to be fed and clothed in kindness. Do treat your women well and be kind to them for they are your partners and committed helpers.”

    Also, read the sources above again to get an idea of the high regard in which Islam holds marriage, as well as love and mercy between spouses (Quran 30:21).

    Sure, cultural differences can exacerbate problems sometimes, but we CANNOT generalize and say the marital problems, like disrespect, laziness, denying her marital RIGHTS, etc. are attributed alone to one spouse being from a different cultural background. Islamic principles and practices (should) come before culture. So if there are problems, then they must seek counselling. And if the problems are not rectified, then it sounds like your friend might be better off without him, regardless of what cultures they both come from. And Allah knows best.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *